Beautiful can be painful

This morning I noticed that once again what little hair I have on the top of my head is starting to curl up into a natural mohawk.  That's the unmistakable sign that it's time.  I've waited too long.  I've got to get a haircut.  So at lunch I went over to the closest hair place to my office to remedy the situation before the reception this weekend. 

I signed in and had a seat to wait my turn. I usually have it buzzed.  How hard can it be to do a #1 on top and a 1/2 on the sides plus its easy for me to remember.  After about 10 minutes its my turn so I have a seat and get started.  The lady reaches for her electric clippers with the appropriate attachment on it and dives right in.  Immediately I'm confused.  I saw the clippers so I know that's what she's using but it feels more like a power scalper.  She pushing so hard that I look in the mirror to check for blood dripping on my shirt. You know how when you take your first bite of Ben and Jerry's Double Fudge Brownie Sundae and you let a little inadvertent moan of joy escape when you didn't mean for it to; well I tried not to whimper but with each pass of the power scalper and subsequent flash of pain I can't be sure that I didn't.  Mercifully in about 5 minutes she spun the chair around so I could see the mirror and asked, "How's that?"  I'm thinking, " I'm fat and I'm bald and now what little hair I have left has been cut below the level of the epidermis" but I quietly squeak out "That;s great."  I pay and finally I'm out of there.  I get out to the parking lot and glance at my shoulders to check for blood. I'm good. Luckily I can put on my helmet to apply pressure to the wound.  (First Aid merit badge)  Looking back now there was a bright side; it hurt so bad that I didn't even notice being itchy the rest of the day.

We're back...

OK, so I admit I'm a big baby.  All this worry about the wedding and feeling older was for naught.  It was a beautiful day; sunny and warm but not hot.  The marriage was perfect and the Logan Temple was very cool.  I'd never been there before.  Even pictures were kind of fun. Everything went fairly smooth until we picked the cake up and found that it was crooked. But Drew's sister-in-law Heather decorated the cake with daisies and made it look perfect.  The wedding luncheon was great; lots of shrimp.  The drive back to Inkom from Logan was uneventful which is always a good thing.  Drew comes from a great family. They really are super people. The reception went great. Lots of Inkomites showed up to wish the happy couple well.  I even played and sang the song for their first dance; Keith Urban's Only You Can Love Me This Way. I forgot the second verse but managed to mumble something similar and I don't think too many people noticed.  All in all it was a very nice event. 

And now, the rest of the story...

We got up Saturday morning in Pocatello, packed up everything, loaded the cars, and then Jake started puking.  We were ready to walk out the door and we had to put him back in the shower. Wasn't even an option. Once he was cleaned up we were ready to start again. This time we made it down the hill to the Chevron station. I filled up both cars with gas, Cameron added some oil to the Escort, and everyone else went in to get some breakfast at the adjoining Burger King.  Cameron and I went in and ordered our breakfast. I got one bite and Jake took off to the men's room.  Naturally I went in to help but he had already locked himself into the only stall.  It was worse than I had imagined. Lucky for him I was there or he would not have had anyone to go get a new change of clothes or to turn away those who innocently came in thinking they were going to be able to use the restroom.  He finally emerged and we left. I told the lady working there that she would probably need to send the maintenance person in to unclog the toilet. I felt bad because she probably was the maintenance person. 

We met Merrianne in the parking lot and I watched as the rest of my biscuit fell in slow motion from the relative safety of Merrianne's overfilled arms to the filthy parking lot below. I went back in and ordered another, but I didn't get to eat it because as soon as I got outside we got a call from Cameron who had already left and headed up the freeway.  It seems the engine in the Escort had blown and he was covering all of west Pocatello in a blanket of thick, oily smoke.  We quickly caught up to him (because he was easy to find) and followed him off the next exit. 

OK, OK I'll speed this up. We had the car towed to a mechanic that Drew's Dad knew in Inkom and we rented a car at the Pocatello airport and drove home.  I got word today from the mechanic that the engine is toast, so he's checking on how much a replacement would be and we're looking at Craig's list and Wheels and Deals just in case.  Merrianne says that it could have been worse; it could have all happened the day before on the wedding day.  How's that for optimism. 

So Ashley and Drew's day went great. Their reception here in the Tri-Cities is Saturday and then they'll be off on their honeymoon to the Oregon coast.  Sooner or later they'll have to come back to reality; hopefully later.  I've had a little too much reality this week.

No kids...

It's really weird not having the constant stream of people coming and going, or the constant questions that begin with "what would happen if...", or being able to watch what I want to watch instead of the Disney channel, or not having to remind certain family members to brush their teeth before they rot out of their head, or to have to jump up and take someone somewhere or go pick somebody up whose been gone all day, or having to constantly say "stop it, stop it, stop it", or to see the house stay clean, or only needing to take the trash out once the whole week instead of needing a green dumpster in front of the house, or not having a muffin ripped out of my hands by someone saying "you really don't need that", or not hearing country music blaring from the downstairs bathroom, not having to go through the whole house turning off all the lights in the empty rooms, not having to explain why showers really are a necessary part of personal hygiene, not feeling foolish because I'm the only person in the house who doesn't know who would win if the Avengers battled the Fantastic Four, or taking several days to fill the dishwasher instead of filling it several times a day, or seeing the 2 gallons of milk sit in the fridge unopened and the cereal boxes not being emptied out in just a few minutes after being removed from the grocery bag, not coming home from work and having no place to park in front of my own house and realizing that the situation is even more ridiculous because I'm riding a motorcycle. 

In a sick, twisted sort of way I miss these things.

But on the other hand I get to nap on the couch on Sunday afternoon without kids wrestling on top of me, eat whatever sounds good for dinner instead of choosing something that we think he might like.  I get to run errands on Saturday at a leisurely pace instead of worring how long they've been alone and whether or not the house is burning down.  I get to take off on a motorcycle roadtrip with my #1 biker chick to Walla Walla to take in a movie (even though she pointed out that the same one was playing just down the road.) But best of all, date night turns into date week and nobody can interfere with our plans. Wait...one of the kids is calling. I better run.  Talk to you later...

Still Counting...

I'm sure Ashley and Drew are still counting too.  We sent Savannah and Jake off to Idaho to spend a week with Lindsay and Travis before the wedding.  They're gonna get to do lots of fun things and get out of town for a little while.  One more fling before school starts.  They are riding part of the way with the Haueters so Travis is driving to Burley today to pick them up. That means our house will be strangely quiet for the next week or so.  Cameron is still home but he's not much of a trouble maker.  He spends his time working on various projects on his computer and when I ask him what he's doing I know the answer I'll get..."nothing".  He seems to get a lot done considering that he's never really doing anything.

So now Cameron's found a ride to Idaho.  Good thing Merrianne and I like each other.

8 days left till the wedding.  We've been working toward this all summer and its almost here.  Weird.  I'm sure its seemed like an eternity for Drew and Ashley but it has flown by for me.  I think we've finally worked out some important details like Merrianne's dress color and some other things for the reception here.  Its strange that Moms get so worked up over these details.  Me, not so much. I'll just put on my suit with the tie color that has been predetermined for me. No decision there.  Stand where I'm told to and shake hands in a friendly manner exuding happiness and fatherly authority.  Not too tough.  Pay the wedding bills when they all start coming next month...AHA.  Now I know where I fit in.  I may be a small part of the puzzle but I'm an important part.  It's nice to feel needed.

Oh well...

Update: From the newsdesk. There will be no painting this weekend. Bummer. My partner in grime and neighbor who is helping me paint the bike is leaving town to visit his ailing mother in Nevada. Yea right; like I haven't heard that one before.  He'll have to come up with something better than that. So the "project" is on hold.

That's OK though because this weekend is the father and sons' campout and if I had forgotten that I would never had heard the end of it.  So Jake and I will be going up to Camp Zarahemla to sleep in the back of the Prius on Friday night.  Sounds like a party you say? You don't even know.  There's nothing like sleeping inside a small car with a gassy 10 year old who considers each gaseous infraction a monumental personal acheivement and the highlight of his methane filled day.  I think I'll leave the windows cracked.

What's New?

Good question. The countdown continues until daughter number 2 becomes the 3rd one married.  (Math is not my thing). I need to interject a little clarification here.  I'm excited for Ashley's wedding. I think Drew is perfect for her and I know they'll be very happy. I guess she's old enough so that's not it. She's not tall enough but there's nothing I can do about that. I think my "issue" is that I'm not old enough to have 3 kids married. That means I could be a grandpa at any time. And it's not being a grandpa that's the problem; it's the title.  I still love to cruise around on my motorcycle. OK a lot of grandpas do that.  But I still like to crank up my electric guitar and play with the guys. For heaven's sake my kids are usually the ones that have to tell me to turn it down. How many grandpas do that?  I don't feel like a grandpa.  Wait a minute... I'm not one yet.  So I guess we'll see how I handle it when the time comes. 

Things have calmed down a little this week.  We had a "work in the yard" FHE last night and for varied legitimate reasons I felt like a one man family.  I received a little help and for that I'm grateful, but I was very alone for most of the time.  I tried singing FHE songs in my head while I cut the grass but my mind kept going back to "Bohemian Rhapsody."  Not really FHE music. It's hard to give yourself a short lesson in your head over the roar of the lawnmower when your attention span is already genetically impaired.  But I did get a lot of yard work done.  And that frees up my Saturday for painting...

Woo hoo

So if my face looks a little redder than normal on Monday morning its probably not a sunburn.